I am soo over blogging........at least for now.

I got nothing....nada. Which certainly does NOT mean that nothing has been going on in my life. I just have not had any desire to blog. In any case, just so I don't feel left behind (considering even NTT's Brain AND theProf busted out with several entries since my last one) I'm throwin out a crappy entry simply to keep up with the Jones'.

1. My blog is getting Spammed. I don't know why its getting Spammed now but I need to stop these bastards from Spamming any further. In all actuality, I have this nagging notion that there isn't a nerdy loser in some basement Spamming away, that in fact its some robotized server in some basement running automated Spam by the billions without regard, remorse, regret, or satisfaction.

2. I love Bouldering. Thanks to NTT's Brain to turning me onto rock climbing. I have all the gear and I'm considering purchasing new shoes with a more aggressive toe:

http://www.rei.com/product/780123

My current shoe, the Defy Evolv, is a great all-around shoe, but its entirely synthetic, totally uncomfortable, and stinks to high heaven.

3. My wife and I are running regularly now. We average a 10 minute mile and won't do more than a mile at a time but we're at least doing it somewhat regularly.

4. Work is work. We've done a ton of reassignments and we're due for some new cuts throughout the system in a month. More and more undocumented, out of county, out of state mentally ill folks are flowing through our County's acute/emergency public health system. I've sent more people on buses and planes BACK to where ever they've come from over the last six months than I have in the last six YEARS. Why do I send them back?...because our City is NOT RESPONSIBLE for EVERYONE'S HEALTH. I'm SICK of other cities sending their masses of mentally ill to my City because they won't care for them. I can really go on quite a rant right now but I won't. I'll leave it right there. Lets just say, you take care of your sick and we'll take care of our sick....agreed?

5. In the East Coast at this time. Very cold. Ran in 14 degree weather...and I LOVED it. It felt like I could have gone on and on and on. The only problem was the biting cold on my face. I could have used a balaclava. Washington is wonderful, old town Pennsylvania in Christmas is beautiful, family and friends are awesome. I always have a good two weeks here. Been on a tour, visited a couple of Museums, and checked out the Dept. of Treasury. My wife's uncle was recently appointed to a position in the Dept. of Treasury working under the Counsel General.

Anywayz, I'm off for dinner. I'll try to get another entry out soon.

Fantastic commentary about the Richmond Gang Rape by a Richmond City Council Member

I thought I'd pass along an insightful commentary by a Richmond City Council member:

I am sure there is something in here to offend almost everyone, but it needs to be said, and that’s what a public forum is all about:

It is not only convenient but also ultra politically correct to blame Richmond’s violence problems, particularly its record setting homicide rate, on something or someone else – usually a variety of societal ills, including racism, social injustice, poverty, joblessness, historical and cultural suspicion of law enforcement and lack of educational opportunities. The failure of residents to alert police to incipient incidents, including weapons, gangs, drugs and feuds is often blamed on fear, family connection and the snitching taboo. Same with crimes that have already occurred.

On the recent violent sexual assault at Richmond High, the same root causes are being discussed, even updated with “economic stresses and foreclosures.”

To make it even more confusing, many of the spokespersons who cite societal ills as precursors and root causes of violence instead of the lack of individual responsibility also embrace selective violations of “unjust” laws, such as those requiring drivers licenses and insurance for persons operating vehicles. I’d be the first to recognize the “Catch-22” quagmire that lack of a federal immigration policy imposes on both undocumented immigrants and law enforcement, but advocating open violations is a slippery slope that allows anyone to rationalize a rule or law does not apply to them because of demographic or sociological circumstances.

Critics are calling for fences, lights, better planning and more and better security. Nothing wrong with that, but there is a deeper problem. For example, parents are not engaged. The CC Times reported, “[Richmond High Principal] Franco said many Richmond High parents usually cannot attend evening events for their high schoolers because they have other kids at home and no one to watch them. A newsletter mailed to parents a few weeks ago outlined upcoming events, but no parents volunteered.”

The Chronicle reported, “Take the poverty-driven frustration of inner-city Richmond, a youth street culture that glorifies thugs and applauds degradation of women, and the desensitization of young men through violent video games, music and language, and you have a template for trouble.” There it is again, poverty, culture and even video games.

These may be partially true and partially real, but some are not. I have yet to see someone turned away from a free public education through at least the 12th grade. I’m not sure where “lack of educational opportunities” comes from, but I see and hear it often. To a significant extent, however, the most violence plagued communities in Richmond are significantly challenged by political, social and economic impacts totally beyond their control. They are facts, but they are not excuses.

All of these societal problems deserve our attention. No one deserves a lack of opportunity to make a life for themselves. All of us in public service should be doing everything we can to alleviate oppressive conditions that challenge people’s ability to lead productive lives. We also have to make sure our public safety organizations (Police Department and Office of Neighborhood Safety) are both responsive and sensitive. Those who are not in public service should be looking for volunteer opportunities with the same objectives.

But that is not the most important thing that has to change. The communities that bear the brunt of violence have to take RESPONSIBILITY for their fate. There, I said it, The “R” word. Only the community itself can stop this. A culture of TOLERANCE is what really drives Richmond’s perennial crime wave. 400 students at the Homecoming party and not one parent volunteered to attend? Not one! Zero!

How many times do Richmond Police arrive at a homicide scene where people are still scattering, and no one saw anything? No one knows anything? The same people who saw nothing have been known to blame the police, the City, the schools or simply “violence” without a face for what has happened. Violence does have a face, and it may be closer than anyone wants to admit. How many Richmond residents know who is carrying or selling weapons, who is dealing drugs and who is harboring a fatal grudge but won’t drop a dime on them?

When a young person becomes a homicide victim in Richmond, the grief of family and friends is understandable and even incomprehensible to those who have been fortunate enough not to have experienced it. But in the subsequent media coverage that talks about the memorials and the redeeming qualities of the deceased, I can’t recall once some friend or family member saying, “You know, he was (pick one - selling drugs, guns, running with a gang). We have to find a way to make sure not one other young person becomes involved in these illegal activities. They are simply tempting fate.” Instead, violence is talked about like something that dropped out of the sky at random like a lightning bolt. As a response, people light candles, hold vigils and pray on Sunday. These things may help, and they certainly may feel good, but what they really need to do is pick up the phone and call the cops when they see trouble or know about something that will ultimately lead to trouble.

Twenty or more people watching a sexual assault, some by all accounts with cell phones, yet no one called the police. A CNN article discussed the “bystander” effect:

Research shows us that students often know ahead of time when and where violence will flare up on campus. Strong social networks and the widespread use of cell phones and text messaging rapidly convey such information. This dynamic can fuel violence, as officials say it did at Richmond High School. It can also prevent violence. Thousands of potential school crimes, including violent ones, have been averted on campuses across the country because students alerted school officials before the crime occurred.

Students and families using a hot line in Colorado were credited with preventing more than 206 incidents of school violence from 2004-06. As of summer 2009, this one hot line fielded 1,687 reports that resulted in crime prevention or intervention. Alert students have also helped prevent replays of the tragedies that occurred at Columbine and Virginia Tech by tipping off school officials. Several years ago, student reports stopped a Columbine-style massacre plot, employing bombs, napalm and automatic weapons, at a high school in Green Bay, Wisconsin. This year, tips from students and alert teachers and police disrupted a student-massacre plot, featuring pipe bombs and firearms, at Hillside High School in San Mateo, California. Since Columbine, school shootings have been averted in New Bedford, New York, and Covina, California, to name some others.

And at Richmond, it was an 18-year-old bystander, overhearing others talking about the incident, who reported the crime. Unfortunately, the public is largely unaware of these frequently heroic acts by high school students and their teachers because they don't often get national media attention. That lack of information has helped obscure the important roles that students and their responsive teachers play in preventing school violence.

There it is – crime prevention and intervention. When every parent and every law-abiding resident of Richmond decides they are madder ‘n hell and aren’t going to take it any longer and are personally going to do whatever it takes at whatever risk to put an end to violence – they will. No one else can do it, not the City, not the School District, not the Police, not the Office of Neighborhood Safety, not the churches and not a hundred non-profit community organizations. This has to be a personal priority with every resident and every parent, just as it was for the 18-year old female who had what no one else had, both the courage and the level-headedness to do the right thing and finally call the cops at Richmond High.

There are those who will say this is “blaming the victim,” meaning blaming the communities where violence takes place. I beg to differ. What we need is a partnership, a full partnership with no holds barred. Until such a partnership is established and operates successfully, the status quo will prevail.

The North and East neighborhood may be a good model for such a partnership. With a Yahoo Group that is plugged into the Police Department and tracks would be criminals from block to block in real time and has recently mounted pro-active community patrols that leave “door-knockers” about code enforcement, report violations nightly and reinforce residents’ inclination to report crimes. I would not recommend the North and East neighborhood as a venue for a criminal to do crime in Richmond right now.

As Pogo said, "We Have Seen the Enemy and It Is Us"

Its been a while:

No desire to post AT ALL. Just throwin out some crap just to get the juices flowing.

1. My wife and I have been running three times a week. I've been circuit training at the gym twice a week. I've also been bouldering twice a week either with NTT's Brain or Rave-boy. End result? My body is perpetually in agony. BTW, I LOVE rock climbing. It really comes naturally to me. After less than two months, I'm hitting V3's. I'm realizing all of it is technique and less about strength. I've relied on brute force to get me up the wall but every time I see a 100lb spindly woman climb up much more difficult boulders it hits me every time how this is all about skill. I'm addicted to climbing.

2. My car rocks. It drives itself, sips gas, and has the loudest stereo I've ever owned. And all hail GPS! And 9000 RPM is music to my ears.

3. Work: As much as I love what I do, every-so-often I see a client I'd like to slap over and over and over again. I know, it's called "counter-transference" and I wallow in it so.

4. Bridge closure: Last Wednesday it took me 2 hours and 14 minutes to get to work, and 2 hours and 7 minutes to get home. I crossed 3 bridges and drove 114 in one frickin day. The entire bridge issue is a complete cluster-fuck debacle. Nuff said.

5. The Richmond gang rape: Didn't want to blog about it but this story has inflamed me with rage. A fifteen year old girl gets brutally gang raped by six men over a two and a half hour period. 180 minutes of pure hell on earth. She was also beaten within an inch of her life. All the while some dozen bystanders watched, took photos, took movies, and did NOTHING.

When the news first broke I told my wife before the News segment ended, "Watch. These idiots are going to blame the school." And low and behold, that's exactly what happened. The problem is and will forever be that we can and will NEVER deal with these kinds of problems if we can't be HONEST with ourselves and each other about what is REALLY going on.

The community claims that this gang rape would never have occurred if they had more Police Officers and security cameras. Now lets take a closer look at this idiotic logic. I suppose they believe that the reason why gang rapes don't occur in San Mateo or Pleasanton or Castro Valley or Gilroy or Marin etc.etc.etc.etc. is that these School Districts have a dozen Police Officers, security cameras, metal detectors, and roving campus security 24/7, Hmmm? No dipshit. Its the same reason why I feel comfortable and safe walking down a street in Burlingame and fear for my life walking down a street in Richmond, ie. all communities are not the same.

This is going to sound obvious to anyone with half a brain but the problem with violence, drugs, gangs, and rape in Richmond can't be solved by schools, nor by Law Enforcement, nor by touchy feely community programs (and this is from a Public Health worker!). They can help, but it cannot by itself stem this tide.

These notions are soo basic and fundamental I actually feel dumb writing it. There isn't any morsels of wisdom in my diatribe. None at all. Any sixth grader can figure this one out. And yet what we will see over the upcoming weeks is the finger of blame pointed squarely at the School and at Law Enforcement and Administration and at local government. So lets see, the reason Belmont School District doesn't have gang rapes and gang murders is because they have a comprehensive "Anti-Gang Rape, Anti-Gang Murder Curriculum" that Richmond School District doesn't have due to budgetary reasons or lack of administrative foresight? I mean that MUST be the reason.

I'm getting angry so I'll cut it off here.

End of the month update:

I have had absolutely NO desire to blog as of late...but decided to bust out an entry just to get caught up.

1. I love my new car....love with a little "L", not like the big "L" with the EVO. In any case, the CIVIC SI is amazing. Its comfortable, quiet, and unassuming. It has remarkable handling, a ridiculously high revving motor (the legendary K20 I-Vtec), and a hyper precise steering rack. It has a massive sound system (the best in any car I've ever owned by far), and equipped with the greatest invention since sliced bread; on board integrated voice controlled GPS.

I actually enjoy driving this car to work. It doesn't destroy my back, hurt my ears, or gulp down gas. The clutch is soooo soooo smooth and the shifter is both precise and effortless...you can literally shift it with just the tip of your pinkie!

2. I sold the EVO X to my body shop buddy. Saw it for the last time (I think) last week.

3. Dealing with some crazy-ass mayhem with clients and facilities at work....and I don't want to write about it. Doing that will only make my head hurt.

4. Gamed a couple of times since my last entry.

5. ThePerfectLine came up to pick up a bunch of stuff from various GOG homes to take back down to his new home in LA. I drove down with him, helped him unpack, and flew up to Oakland Monday morning in time to get to work.

We stopped by Buttonwillow Raceway to see a buddy of ours. I brought my helmet just in case I managed to finagle a ride-along. I saw four tricked out EVO X's and it made me sad and wanting. All of that changed after I got in a ride in a CIVIC SI. I spotted it across the paddock area, a white sedan, same exact car as mine. Of course it was modified, but just barely. He had Enkei RPF1's wrapped in NT01's, mono-block calipers, Bride seats, and a four-point. The driver was an instructor in the most advanced run group. I started a conversation and requested a ride...he said YES.

I literally closed my eyes during most of the first lap. I've never been to Buttonwillow and had NO CLUE how the course ran turn by turn...add the fact that Buttonwillow has multiple configurations and the course looked even more confusing. In any case, the SI blew my mind!! I can't believe how well this car handled and how planted, controllable, and poised the car is at the limit. I'm sure alot of it has to do with the Civic running R-comps and the driver being very skilled, but it left me giddy and awestruck.

So in the end, I am actually looking forward to tracking the SI. It will be a riot to have cars with twice the horsepower looking at their rear view mirror and giving a Point-by to a Civic Sedan!

6. Been rock-climbing regularly at Planet Granite with NTT's Brain. I went for the first time just to check it out. By the end of that hour, I was addicted. One downside: your forearms and hands are completely destroyed for several days after each climbing session.

Last week, Rave-boy accompanied us and we both went way way past the point of sanity. Our bodies screamed "ENOUGH" but our Wills pushed us to climb one more time...then one more time again...then again, and again. The next day, I didn't have the strength to squeeze tooth-paste onto my tooth brush.

But damn, rock-climbing is loads of fun...and a hell of a work-out to boot.

7. There is no seven because I gotta get back to work.

Wow, it's been a while....

Sheesh, even theProf busted out with an entry before I did. Anywayz, alot of stuff going on lately and haven't had any desire to blog, but I figure I should throw something out as catch-up.

1. Read theProf's latest entry on Veganism. I don't know if he intended it to be funny but I really laughed out loud. I think its because he's quite good at taking specious reasoning to its most ridiculous yet logical conclusion.

2. My wife got rehired! Its only for this year and she's been moved to the High School in her school district. But she LOVES the job....and we certainly like the idea that she's getting a paycheck. She's blown away by the kids at her school...talk about high-achievers! I'll blog about that at another time.

3. Been driving a PT-Cruiser for nearly a month now. I'm returning that POS tomorrow because I'm picking up my new car tonight!!!!

4. Before we get into that, just some updates. Firstly, here are some pics of the damage. I find it difficult to look at.







So the car has been deemed totaled, meaning the cost of repairing her exceeds a particular percentage based on my Insurance company's total loss formula. I was mailed the adjuster's estimate and it was nearly 26,000 in damages. My trusty body-shop feels that the estimate was drastically inflated but all things considered, it helped total out the car.

In the end, I'm actually profiting from the loss to a tune of several thousand dollars!! I should crash my car more often. This was clearly due to my buying my car for such an un-godly low amount. For about five days last week, the Perfectline and I considered buying back my car at 15% of its market value and paying my body-shop to fix it to mechanical spec with less effort spent on getting the car's paint and body to look perfect. We figured why not make it a track car! But alas, even the bare-bones estimate of repair was a few thousand above what we hoped to pay...and we're not comfortable with even slight frame damage repair anywayz.

But the body shop owner decided to buy her and she will drive again! He was bothered by the idea that the car would be parted and scraped and strongly believed that it was an easy albeit pricey fix. So I sold him the car and he'll be working on it himself...a multi-weekend project for him. And in the end, even with a salvage title, he should make several thousand bucks profit.

As for the new car, well it's not really a new car, but I did get the best deal I possibly could on her. After an exhaustive Internet search, I set out to eyeball 14 of the best cars/deals I found on-line. It took me most of my Labor Day weekend and my travels took me as far north as Concord and as far south as San Jose.

I came pretty darn close to picking up a sweet bone-stock 06 WRX but fell in love with an even sweeter Civic SI...yes, you heard me, a CIVIC. I can't believe I actually like this car! I love the color, it's only a year and a half old, still has a warranty, in near perfect condition (except for the shifter boot), has a bad-ass stereo, and will have my first real NAV. It has less than 25K miles (for a Civic, that's just past her break-in!), and the person I'm purchasing the car from is selling it for three grand under blue-book!

The seller is a doctor working out of one of our local public hospitals and simply wants to get rid of it....he originally bought if for his son as a graduation gift but considering he bombed this last semester, he didn't see fit rewarding him. His loss is my gain. The seller has no time and certainly not at all interested in making a killing on this sale so he priced it low and put an Ad up on Craigslist on Friday night. As soon as I saw her Saturday afternoon, I put down a deposit.

I'm picking her up tomorrow and despite having an utterly gutless motor, I love hearing that K20 Vtec revving to 9000 RPM, yes 9 Grand. My goodness, you shift at 8500! And you better believe I'm taking her to the TRACK!!...and very soon. Okay, I'll be the slowest least powerful car out there, especially considering the car's power to weight ratio, but that will make it even more satisfying to PASS track monster's in a frickin HONDA CIVIC!!! That will be Hilarious!!

And as for daily commuting, can you think of a better car? And lastly, I don't think this car can kill me in the way my old car could. I suppose I could drive ANY car, regardless of its power and kill myself by taking it to it's maximum velocity and slamming into a brick wall...but my point is that I don't want my daily driven car to be a track monster. It's akin to having a Thoroughbred race horse pulling a milk cart every day...it's a total waste and completely pointless. Furthermore, driving a track monster everyday makes it too too much of a temptation to drive her like I was on a racetrack, and treat every stretch of twisties like I'm some sort of Micheal Shummi. This car should be a pretty good antidote for that temptation.

Anywayz, gotta get back to work. I'll take some pics of the car when I have the time.

I totaled the EVO last night.

Its three in the morning and I can't sleep. I'm traumatized and feel nauseous. I think writing about it will help.

Last night at about 9 PM after having dinner with the Prof., I decided to drive up Sharp Park Road for a spirited jaunt in the EVO. We were half way up the hill and approaching a 4th gear 90 degree left-hander. I took the entrance at a comfortable speed. The following will be a millisecond by millisecond blow by blow.

Entry was smooth.

At mid-corner, the back end started coming out slowly. I expected this and maintained my velocity and throttle angle.

Then very rapidly the back end swung out in a way I've never experienced before.

".......what's happening?......."

I didn't lift for sure and applied opposite lock in the direction of the skid.

The car snapped in the opposite direction, toward the center median. I couldn't catch it quickly enough.

"......This can't be happening......."

Then the car snapped in the other direction again. By this time, I was careening toward the guard rail and all steering input were futile attempts. I was no longer in any control of the car.

".......I'm in an EVO dammit, this can't be happening!!......"

The car impacted the guard rail at 50 miles per hour. We bounced off of it and pin-balled back onto the road and slowly ground to a halt after 50 feet.

I was stunned. Was I dreaming? The whole thing seemed so surreal. Did what happened really just happen? The Prof. immediately asked me if I was okay. I said yes and asked him the same. I turned off the car, turned on my hazards, unbuckled my belt and then it hit me:

".....Oh My God. My car is destroyed......"

Soon after my 911 call, a Police cruiser showed up and took charge of the situation. I had no idea what to do and he walked me through the entire process. He was supportive and non-plus about it all. But most importantly, he made sure we understood that we can be comforted by the fact that we were alive...and without a single scratch.

A flat bed tow truck came by and we towed my wreck back to his shop parking lot where other crashed vehicles await insurance review. The owner took one look under the car with his flashlight and said that there was frame damage. He opened both front doors and the panels weren't flush. All this meant that the car is a total loss.

The Prof. has been unbelievably kind and supportive throughout it all. He gave me a ride back to his house where I made the call to my insurance company. Afterward, he drove me to my parents house. I'm taking advantage of their being on vacation and took the liberty of borrowing my Mother's car to get home.

I gave my wife a huge hug when I arrived. My mind has been swimming with thoughts and I'm feeling alot of different emotions.

Firstly, I feel horrendously guilty and apologetic toward the Prof. I risked his frickin LIFE this evening. We drove up the hill in his van afterwards to examine the site of the crash. Apparently if I had missed the guardrail by a mere FIVE FEET we would have careened into a tree and/or down the cliff at 50 MPH. We're lucky to be alive.

We talked about alternate dimensions shortly after that and it occurred to us that in some parallel universe somewhere, we had missed that guardrail and the Prof. and/or I were killed. Both of our wives would receive calls from the Police that we were dead. I couldn't live with myself if I had killed the Prof. while on a stupid joyride.

Secondly, I feel utterly guilty for having put my wife through such a fright. She could have lost her husband and in this regard I am truly ashamed of myself.

Then, of course, there's my CAR. My beloved EVO. Its destroyed beyond repair. I was going to spend the weekend buffing out a small scratch on the trunk. I can't believe I've wrecked her. She'll never drive again.

Lastly, I'm traumatized. You see, I haven't lost control of a car in 20 years, and I've never been in a serious car accident EVER. I've had powerful sports cars my entire life, have a good half-MILLION miles of driving under my belt, and been to the race-track a dozen times. I PRIDE myself in my driving, and more so pride myself to near arrogance in the way I believe I know my limits. On the race-track, I've never spun and, more-so, have never even been in an awkward situation, let alone a crash. Simply put, I felt I was a darn safe driver with alot of high-performance driving experience.

Furthermore, this is one of my favorite stretches of road. I've driven it a thousand times over the course of nearly two decades. I regularly drive it up and down nearly every week. I know every inch of it.

And this is what scares me the most: I took that turn slowly (relatively speaking). I regularly enter that turn 10 mph quicker. ThePerfectLine takes that turn 15 mph quicker. And on a race-track, I would nonchalantly enter a similar turn at much much higher velocity with the added complexity of deep braking and a down-shift before executing the turn. I went in slow and, in my estimation, well under the limit....and I WAS WRONG.

I was utterly wrong. I lost control where I believed I couldn't lose control. And in this regard, I feel not only totally humiliated but totally unsure of everything I know about driving. Even driving home in my Mother's Corolla made me uneasy.

Last week I signed up for an Aug 30th track day at Thunderhill. A buddy of mine is willing to lend he his Miata for the day. It was a nice gesture but it makes my stomach turn with idea of hitting the track. If I was told right now that I could never go to the race track ever again, I'd be okay with that. If I was told right now that I'd have to live with driving a Prius, I'd be okay with that. I am so unsure of my driving that I think I'd enjoy and feel safer driving my Mother's Corolla for a while.

Part of me wants to go right back out there and learn what I did wrong. Get another brand new EVO, build it up exactly like my wrecked EVO, go out to a deserted Alameda airfield, recreate that turn in cones, and drive it ten thousand times to, not only, desensitize me, but also to figure out how the fuck I spun when I thought there was no way I could. At this time, I don't think I can feel comfortable ever driving in any other way other than like a Grandma if I weren't able to put myself through this.

Its nearly five in the morning now and I should try to get some rest.

I feel better after writing this. When you see me next or call me after hearing the news of the crash, I'll probably end up referring you to this blog entry.

All things considered, I feel blessed and lucky for both the Prof. and I having survived the crash without any injuries whatsoever. Furthermore, despite the destruction of my car, my insurance company will send me a check for its current Blue Book Value which (I've just checked) far exceeds what I even paid for the vehicle NEW!! I've walked away physically and financially unscathed with an invaluable life lesson learned and just a bit of a bruised ego to show for it all. So I suppose I shouldn't complain.

At some point in the near future, I'll have to decide what car to buy next. I can't believe I'm actually considering buying an Insight Hybrid!! Perhaps my days of high-performance driving are over. I'm not worried...knowing me, I'll find another all consuming hobby to take its place in no time.

Film Review: Martyrs by Pascual Laugier

The Prof. had me watch this film last night and I'm still reeling. He should have warned me about the content, but that would have only piqued my curiosity. Mind you, I love the Horror Film Genre, but this film pushes into new uncharted territory.

I am angry at the director for having made this film....he's what I'd call a "Directorial Terrorist". I most certainly will never forget this film in the same way I will never forget seeing my first dead body, or when I that knife fell off the kitchen counter onto my foot when I was three, or when I went in for my circumcision at the age of four (as Filipino's do for some ghastly sadistic reason), or when I was attacked and bitten by a dog at eight. And in this most perverted way, I give Laugier grudging Kudos as a film maker.

You see, when it comes to most Film, I am more than willing to hand the Director the keys to my unconscious mind. I allow myself to go where they intend me to go, to see what they ask me to see, to feel what they allow me to feel. And in this respect, constant exposure (by virtue of my career) combined with my own strangely demented psychology has inured me to even the most horrific or tragic or desperately sad content. Rarely does a director grab these keys, enter into my intrapsyche, and trash my mind to a degree that I can't clean up afterwards. And in those very rare cases where the director empathically assaults my sensibilities, he/she has been at least kind enough to clean up a bit afterwards.

In Martyrs, this is not the case. This Bastard of a Director grab my keys, then kicks the door down, detonates a bomb, and then walks right out the door leaving me with what amounts to as a dust-broom to clean up afterwards....that was the nature of the End of this movie for me. ZERO resolution.

The Prof. helped me try to find closure but he himself was struggling to glean redemption from the most subtle and meager tid-bits.

I appreciate the Prof. making me watch this film and I would recommend this film to my Goober friends. But anyone, particularly women, with any trauma or abuse history (specifically childhood abuse history) would be wise to stay away.

The unflinching camera and approach to the inhumanity and cruelty lacking any editorial or moral judgement borders on the unethical and steps clearly into indecency with it's porno-gore depictions. No soundtrack, no turning away, no escape, no more boundaries.

There was a point in the film where for the first time in my life I actually didn't want to continue watching. With 30 minutes left before it's end, I told the Prof. that I was angry with the Director and felt he had made his point and that the remaining 30 minutes of assured graphic torture was completely and utterly unnecessary to further the plot. He reassured me of some sort of redemption but it never came....at least for me.

I'd like you guys to see this movie so that we can commiserate as if after some shared trauma. Watch it as it was intended; in French with subtitles, with ZERO distractions.

If by chance you find yourself cheering or laughing with giddiness at certain points of this film, I sincerely question your sanity. This movie was meant to offend and if you're not, there is something wrong with your soul.

Damn, its been a month.

I haven't had any desire to blog at all. I figure I should throw something out there and see what comes up. Recent events both big and small.

1. Manhattan Adventures with wife. Always fun. Explored and explored. There is soo much to see and do and eat that at times it can be bit overwhelming. We thoroughly explored Central Park and the Upper East side via Madison and Park Avenue. Re. the Upper East side, the people here look like they've all walked off some Paris runway, and by Jeebus, two million for a 1000 square foot apartment?!?!?

Saw a Broadway Show, took a tour, and walked close to 10 miles over two days. BTW, there's a Deli across from Carnegie Hall called "Carnegies". They're known for their corned beef and pastrami. With cozy seating arrangements, we had opportunities to chat with our table neighbors. One guy next to us (strangely enough, a tourist from San Francisco) was told by his parents to order the Matzo-Ball soup and Reuben. When it arrived, I swear to you, the Matzo Ball was the size of a Soft Ball, and the Reuben....well, I can't describe its dimensions without sounding exaggerated so I'll just give you a pic.



It's unfortunate that I don't have anything to show scale but lets just say that it was 5 inches high and the plate was 12 inches across. Here is a pic of there "Small Plate" Pastrami sandwich.



2. July 4th Parade and Fireworks in Small-Town Pennsylvania. Spent several days with my wife's sister's family. My niece and nephew are always loads of fun. We swam, ate ice-cream, BBQ'd, caught Fire-bugs, had cold drinks on a porch rocker, and went without shoes the entire time. The parade and the street they ran the parade seemed straight out of some Norman Rockwell digest on Americana...at least it seemed like it to me. I half expected Charlie Brown and Linus to walk down some Elm and Maple lined street with Snoopy in tow...very quaint neighborhoods.

3. Worked on the Craftsman's brakes one entire night. I'm really getting the hang of this. In fact, while in Penn., my wife's family friend and neighbor just purchased an E36 M3. He's a track guy; a retired Navy fighter pilot and commercial pilot and now looking to track driving to fill that need for speed.

It's funny; my wife's family consider the man to be a quiet man...a man of few words. But when we discovered we shared this mutual hobby/passion, we couldn't stop talking shop! Swapping track stories and car plans the entire day. I ended up spending the most of one day helping out replacing control arms, suspension, and brakes on his new track car. And let me tell you, retired Fighter Pilots tell the best frickin stories....I was enthralled.

4. Lost a colleague to budget cuts. He was reassigned. The rest of us will survive.

5. Wife scouring the web for a new job. I have NO DOUBT IN MY MIND that she will be hired by any School District with a position to fill...but the problem is, there's no positions to fill. Most districts are experiencing a contraction in staffing, and those that are not aren't expanding. But we're only mid-summer and there is still hope.

6. Discovered TETRIS FRIENDS and I'm hooked. I try not play every day but my goodness, I feel I may succumb to addiction. BTW, I think I'm pretty darn good at playing Tetris. I'll let you guys watch me one day. The speed at which I play now is truly impressive...hehehehe.

You may know Tetris from its early Game-boy version, the 89 version. NEW Tetris, post 96, is based on the original but has some updated features that make for super fast game play. At Tetris Friends, a website with tens of thousands of Tetris players from across the globe, you'll find the old and slow retro Tetris, and you'll find four new variations: Survival, Marathon, Ultra, and Sprint. You'll also find two player, five player, and six player battles. In battles, you develop a RANKING. The ranks are from ONE to TWENTY. Of the thousand upon thousand of players, there are only a few hundred rank TWENTY players. In California, there are only 29 rank TWENTY players. I'm rank fifteen which puts me somewhere in the top 200 in the State of California.

In two-player battle, I can't seem to beat the Rank sixteen players. I can't even imagine the Rank Twenty folks. If you're interested, check out some of the Rank Twenty player replays. I'm not kidding you...they are soo fast, you don't even see the pieces come down, all you see is the blocks building at times five pieces PER SECOND!!! Furthermore, in the highest level, you don't even have the benefit of SEEING THE BOARD!!!!! It's invisible!!!!! I'm quite good at Survival and one of these days I'll show you the invisible bonus round.

If your curious, here are my stats. See if you can even come close. I have no doubt you won't...hehe.

SPRINT: 1 minute 20 seconds, but I can beat that time. My fastest time on my phone Tetris is 58 seconds.
ULTRA: 17,392. I think I can get 20,000 if I utilize more T-spins.
SURVIVAL: 440,000. That game ranks probably in the top thousand ever played!

Check it out. If you're as obsessive as I am, you'll get hooked in no time!!

Gotta go.

Sorry for the long hiatus.

Not been in the mood but I suppose I'll just go ahead and throw out a blog entry. Who reads these things anywayz?

1. Politics: I don't want to talk about it. The loudest voices are typically the most annoyingly partisan and extreme. If I listen too closely, I get upset and frustrated by the rhetoric. And there's one thing about Obama that has a bit disappointed me thus far.

We all know that the Shah of Iran pre the 1979 Islamic Revolution was a "puppet", if you will, of the West, and particularly the US. The Revolution, which replaced a Monarchy with a Fundamentalist Theocracy, was welcomed by Arab nations. And Muslims throughout the world praised the revolution as a conservative backlash against the Westernizing and secularizing efforts of the Western-backed Shah. Given this history, Obama (a determined conciliator) would be wise to depict his Administration as "Non-Meddlers" in Iranian politics, and in foreign politics in general. He prides himself on this position and his Presidential Election platform reflected this attitude that in-turn seemed to resonate strongly with American voters. So I UNDERSTAND why he would be very careful in his choice of words.

I also understand that most sane Earthlings view Ahmadinejad as a complete lunatic with an inferiority complex and I no-doubt believe our Administration feels the same. Mousavi is not much better, but these points are irrelevant.

In Obama's most recent speech at Cairo, he re-iterated his Administration's view on Muslim extremism by again reaching out to ally himself with the millions of Muslims who DO NOT support their extremist leaders...and in a way encouraged those dis-enchanted millions in Iran to speak their truth and demand new leadership.

So, the most relevant issue is that there are Iranian citizens protesting in the streets; they are demonstrating despite fear of slaughter, they are demonstrating for CHANGE, and they are demonstrating because the wish to deny their fundamentalist political leadership, and they are demonstrating even as they are dying.

Now I don't expect Obama to throw down some rhetoric that would incite the Iranian dissenters to riot relentlessly. But he should AT LEAST support a position that demands a "recount" of the votes, or some statement that addresses the claims and desperate concerns of millions of Iranians that this last "Election" was a complete farce. He hasn't once questioned the outcome of the election, and that is disappointing. These activist's and dissenter's are HIS (and in-a-way OUR) ALLIES in a movement that would have the Middles-East led by more moderate and less Jihadist Fundamentalists. We can't turn our backs on them.

2. Okay, enough about politics....and didn't I say I didn't want to talk about it? Anywayz, theDiscourser, his wife, my wife and I went out to explore the Mission's nightlife last Friday. We had a total blast. The food was really not that good but the people-watching, Sangria, and festively crowded streets were fun...and there are TONS and TONS of places to explore just in the Mission.

3. Hit THUNDERHILL yesterday with Rave-boy and his girlfriend. I suppose I can go through a session by session break-down of events, but I won't. I know that stuff is boring for everyone but myself, so I'll make the re-cap short. We had a BLAST. Great weather, great cars, no break-downs, no spins, no-crashes, and awesome driving. I'm working more and more on skill-building and the EVO takes everything I throw at it. In my particular run-group (run-groups are divided by skill-level and experience), I can pretty much keep up with the fastest drivers regardless of what they're driving. Make no mistake, I still get passed by a few, but once they pass me, they're not shaking me loose. I am right on their ass. And this is the KEY: I'm in complete control...I'm not driving over-my-head to keep up. I'm driving within my capabilities. I'm sure if thePerfectLine was driving, he'd just pass everyone with complete ease in my car, but I'm not close to that skill level yet...but I'm working on it!

That's it for now. Going out to eat some lunch. I saw two new eateries down the block: New York Pizza and Phat Burger. I think I'll check one out.

Local school district struggles with budget cuts:

The City my wife works within failed to pass a parcel tax that was designed to supplement the anemic school district budget. The Measure failed 63% to 37%...they needed 66% for it to pass. The 37% can party it up now.

The next day, my wife was handed a pink slip.

Understandably, we're upset. My wife really found a home at this school. The kids were great, the administrators at the school rocked, her co-workers were wonderful, and her commute was a cinch. She'll miss the school and her school is saddened to see her leave. Oh well...back to the drawing board.

Above and beyond how this budget crisis affects me and my wife personally, I was utterly shocked at how these cuts would affect the children. Her school district had already struggled with too few School Counselors at the Elementary School level. That situation has worsened to a point where you're laughing out loud from the abject lunacy and crying at the same time from sadness and hopelessness.

Why? Her School District has now cut the Counseling staff at the Elementary School level to a point where EACH of the TWO (as in "2", like one plus one equals TWO) counselors carry a caseload of 3000...NOT a TYPO. Yes THREE-THOUSAND EACH. Furthermore, these two poor souls will be spread across NINE schools...NOT a TYPO. Yes NINE. Are we living in a frickin THIRD WORLD COUNTRY!!!

The situation is absurd. Any decent and sane person would be outraged. But at WHO? Depending on your political leanings, you'll hear different blame-games. I don't GIVE A SHIT at this point. Our State's inability to get their spending act in shape is impacting the health and welfare of children (not to mention the disabled cohort I work with...but that's another story).

How can these TWO counselors address the psycho-social needs of SIX THOUSAND CHILDREN.
- How many need testing?
- How many need special-ed services?
- How many need one-on-one counseling?
- How many are dealing with abuse and violence at home?
- How many are dealing with drugs and gangs?
- How many are dealing with bullying?
- How many are dealing with suicide, self-mutilation, and depression?
- How many need group counseling?
- How many need family counseling?
- How many are struggling with grief, death and loss?
- How many have no parents?
- How many have ineffectual parents?
- How many are in poverty?
- How many need case-management?
- How many need confict mediation?
- How many just need someone to talk to?

I'm going to leave you with that. Feel free to let it soak it in. Party it up tax-payers! We really showed these kids whose Boss, huh! Pull yourselves up by the bootstraps kids cause you're on you're own!

Yes, I'm still alive.

Sorry for the long hiatus. I suppose I could have blogged, but not much in the mood as of late. I've had alot on my mind concerning county and state budget deficits. My CRAP union voted twice to accept concessions and I'll be taking a bit of a pay-cut. I know I should celebrate considering some of my colleagues have been laid-off while others reassigned. I know it has to do with the budget crisis and the global recession, but its unfortunate that our disabled citizens take the brunt with less services and with contracting resources.

I can hear the cry now; "Pull yourselves up by your bootstraps you lazy bum!!". I suppose that mentally tortured Schizophrenic living in squalor and filth slowly dying in the gutter should take that advice, but at the moment he's preoccupied with struggling against killing himself and picking the bugs out of his open wounds.

Regarding bearing the brunt in efforts to balance state and local budgets, Mt. Diablo, Redwood City, and Pleasanton County residents have narrowly turned down parcel tax initiatives which would have bridged the deficit gap. All required a two-thirds majority and all were within 2-3 percentage points.

http://www.contracostatimes.com/politics/ci_12411798
http://www.insidebayarea.com/ci_12507806
http://www.insidebayarea.com/pleasanton/ci_12511999

Mt. Diablo alone handed out 150 teachers pink slips yesterday...I suppose these teachers were getting rich with their outrageously high salaries. This should teach them a lesson, right? Class size in that district will go from sub-30 to 37. I mean let's take that line of thinking to its obvious logical conclusion: have ONE class of 1500 children, stuff them in a gymnasium and employ one teacher. That would save alot of money, right?

But the LAST thing we should do right now is TAX THE RICH any more than they are...I mean that would be Un-American, Un-Patriotic, and Un-Christian. Increasing taxes to raise revenue is utterly EVIL and SATANIC. It's downright Socialist, Communist, and completely Immoral. I must be some sort of Nazi to even suggest it!

But you CAN call this idea stupid...now THAT I can handle. But all kidding aside; is there a way to raise revenue without shooting ourselves in our collective capitalist foot? I realize all of us are in bed with the Rich...we count on them for jobs. But is there such as thing as fair and just tax policies? I can hear theProf. now; "But WHO would decide what is fair and just?". True, which is why I get frustrated with this conundrum. There are no easy answers.

A recent New York Times article on Prop. 13 and California's "State of Paralysis".

http://www.nytimes.com/2009/05/25/opinion/25krugman.html

Clearly we need some major reform as it relates to Education. The Discourser is much more adept at this topic than I, but he'll be the first to suggest that we do a complete Re-Boot of the entire system. Furthermore, where the hell is all the money going? Clearly teachers aren't getting rich, and Unions take in a percent or two. But what about the rest? If I find out that some un-godly percentage goes to centralized Sacramento administrators, I'll probably have to murder someone. Again, no easy answers.

Some articles on California Education Crisis:

http://www.californiaprogressreport.com/2009/03/what_does_seven.html
http://www.spokesman.com/stories/2009/may/23/california-budget-crisis-comes-to-head/

I'd actually be quite a Republican with regard to economic tax policies but I can't seem to stomach Right-Wing political rhetoric. Too Draconian and inhumane for my tastes....and this is considering my previous comment about murdering someone. I'm sick of hearing "We need more money! That will solve all our problems!" from the Left, and "You have enough money. Don't ask for more!" from the Right. Can we F-ing come up with a better solution?!?!

I don't know how to solve this mess, but one thing I do know. No matter what, we can't piss off the Wealthy. Hurt them and they hurt us trickle-down-style. Over tax industry and they move out of the state or out of the country to get a better deal. They have us completely over the barrel and the Republicans are right about that. Ultimately, we have to kiss their asses.

I hate ending this blog entry this way but I feel pretty pessimistic today...my apologies.

STAR TREK at IMAX

Firstly, please see theDiscourser.blogspot.com for his description of the events and his take on the movie. Well said indeed.

As for me and my review of the Movie; my personal psychology won't permit me to be entirely or completely invested in one particular side or position in most issues in life...and I'm referring to whether "STAR TREK" rocked or sucked. I'm too much able to appreciate other various points of view....and perhaps this "Ability" has more to do with it being a necessity in my career (an appreciation and empathy for client's personal realities however strange or psychotic or nonsensical or juvenile or perverted or psychopathic it might be).

So to channel the purists, I will acknowledge errors in continuity. Furthermore, there were errors in the internal continuity within the film, errors even within the "sci-fi" science realm, ie. I will accept that in the Star Trek Universe, there exists a mysterious liquid that can create quantum singularities. However, I can't accept that their black holes are different than um...okay...even as I'm writing, I'm realizing how utterly geeky I am.

In any case, I can go on a bit about the things I didn't like in the film, but please don't think that this suggests that I didn't like Star Trek. Nay, you would be incorrect. Lets just say, as theDiscourser so aptly decribes, my Face has been Ripped Off my skull. The only difference might be that theDiscoursers face was on the floor of the theatre; it's torn connective tissues mingling with fake butter dribbles and squished bubble-gum. My face, on the other-hand, is still hanging on by some muscle threads at the base of my chin. I'm frantically attempting to keep it from tearing off entirely.

So in a nutshell: Star Trek ROCKED. Completely and utterly exceeded all my expectations. I cheered and pumped my fists and simply didn't care about all the little errors and cinematic foibles. I was too deeply in goober-heaven to care.

Boy, the Media LOVES pandemics, don't they?

Media coverage of the Swine Flu perfectly demonstrates how the media loves to over-dramatize a story to such a degree that it creates PANIC. "You're WRONG Supergoober! People are dying! It's a raging pandemic!". You sir are a blithering idiot.

Case and point...and this should shut you up for good.

Perhaps 180 people have died of the Swine Flu WORLDWIDE. This is terrible indeed and I commend governments for taking action to restrict the spread of this virus.

Comparitively 4400 people will DIE of AIDS in Africa TODAY...and another 4000 tomorrow, and 4000 more on Friday, and another 4000 Saturday, and another 4000 Sunday, and another 4000 next Monday, and another 4000 next Tuesday, and another 4000 next Wednesday, and another 4000 next Thursday, every day this year. You want to talk EPIDEMIC you frickin MORON! And this is JUST AFRICA!

Oh, BTW, 146,000 people will die of something today throughout the world. Oh, and I forgot to mention, 25,000 will die of HUNGER and STARVATION. How was lunch today? And over 2,000 people will KILL THEMSELVES today. That make you feel sad and blue?

In other words Media, take you Swine Flu Panic and shove it up your ass.

My comment copied from TheProf's blog:

Responding to:

http://ifbrevityiswitthenwhydoikeep.blogspot.com/2009/04/james-joyces-dead-part-1-from-memory.html

"....and we get to see where our own foibles might dovetail with Gabriel's."

Ding, ding, ding! We have a winner. That's me (and I know you)...and the best stories are those that invite us to identify with aspects of certain protagonists.

In any case, Joyce is WAY WAY WAY over my head. Despite that, I can utterly appreciate any work that demands so much attention, delicate thoughtfulness, and participation from the audience. Jasper Johns and Miles Davis comes to mind in art and music respectively.

To often in today's world do we see folks interpret experiences based on first impression. Personally, and cynically, I believe this simply has to do with there being alot of stupid people in this world (just see what movies and music sells best and it becomes pretty apparent). Example: the Rorschach inkblot. This test does, to a certain degree, correlate strongly with intelligence.

Let me explain: you show them an inkblot that looks like a bat. You ask them, "What do you see?". They respond, "Looks like a bat". Then you ask them again, "Besides a bat, what else do you see?". This invites the person to enlist they're imagination and more importantly, their unconscious mind in the service of interpreting a rather amorphous looking blob.

Guarded folks are quick to respond with bat-like responses: bird, butterfly, moth, etc. One particular thing to note here is the time element. Guarded folks are also generally quick to respond with surface impressions. Inviting them to "think" utilizes faculties that stupid and unimaginative people just don't have. Mind you, the test is much more complex than I've described but with regard to this "staying on the surface", it does in a way speak both to an unwillingness to tap deeper into one's psyche and inability, for reasons associated with intelligence. Furthermore, too much in the other direction speaks to a psychotic process but I won't go into that.

Now back to the story. Joyce like Jasper Johns and Miles Davis and Stanley Kubrik, all of them asks the audience "What do you see?". Stupid people within the first 9 seconds will say "A bat" and nothing more. They don't see transcendent potential, or symbolic themes, or an invitation to delve deeper into one's imagination and unconscious. All they see and will EVER see is a frickin BAT.

I can't talk to these people. They're just dumb. I know I'm being too harsh because perhaps it might have to do with Maslow's principles and that perhaps they do have the competence but are currently dealing with more important and pressing matters like food and shelter and issues related to their health. Issues related to self-actualization and introspective enlightenment can't be addressed when you are emotionally or physically overwhelmed with other more important life issues. Which is why most folks look to movies as "escape" and want nothing more than to spend 90 minutes in a dark theater laughing about something that means nothing about nothing.

Reading Joyce smacks of that level of meditative thoughtfulness. I'd imagine most folks could sprint through "The Dead" in an hour and see nothing but a boring story. These are the same folks that listen to Davis and say, "This isn't music, where are the lyrics?". The same people that will watch "Apocalypse Now" and say "I got bored. For a war movie, there wasn't enough action in it. MORE EXPLOSIONS, MORE EXPLOSIONS!" I feel sorry for folks like that.

But I (like you) enjoy being challenged, which doesn't mean I can't be quite a Philistine at times!...hehehe

Music I can't get out of my head:

I think Lilly Allen is amazing...and so so adorably cute. I was introduced to her with her track "The Fear". My favorite version is the Stonbridge Explicit remix which you listen to here:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sozsgo5aXnI

...and she's dating Ed Simmons, the guy from Chemical Brothers so she's cool on top of being cute.
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Also really digging anything Kaskade and particularly his work with Deadmau5. My favorite at this time is this track:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DFlI6vJjX48
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The next has been quite an all consuming search for me. I've attempted to find one particular version that's been stuck in my head for years. There are literally HUNDREDS of versions of BINARY FINARY on YouTube:
- Paul Van Dyke's remix
- DJ Tiesto remix
- Gouryella remix
- Binary 1998, 1999, and their own Finality Mix
- KayCee remix
just to name a few. But I've finally found the version I've been searching for here:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IF2wKZMfdiI

...totally epic version.
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And just to throw in a curve ball, Nessun dorma (No-one shall sleep) is a tenor aria from the final act of Giacomo Puccini's opera Turandot. I swear, this piece of music was written by God himself. Just epic. On youtube, you might find a hundred different versions from Boceli to Paul Potts to Domingo to some no-name opera student. But whatever you do, save Pavarotti's 1994 Los Angeles version for last. This guy's voice is once in a century...just completely effortless.
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Next is my favorite Dream Theater song...for now...its difficult to chose with this band! It's called "Glass Prison". The best vid is this one (IMHO). It's the video of Portnoy laying down the Drum track...AWESOME!!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zrxGBQ7XL6k
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Next up bums me out cause the singer is dead. Drowning Pool's "Tear Away".

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OUh2rw9o2JY
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The next blows my mind watching it. It's Paul Gilbert's tribute to Eddie Van Halen. The most insane aspect of this piece is that it's played on only three strings AND all the strings are tuned to "E", three octave separation. This guy is a frickin genius. BTW, just skip past the electric part to the acoustic part. The second part is Paul attempting to "teach you" how to play this piece...he MUST be kidding.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I4NNE3NRjJQ
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And next up is Miles Davis. This guy is a frickin REVELATION every time I hear him. It's neigh impossible to chose a favorite but certainly almost anything from "Kind of Blue" (which in my opinion is one of the most important works in music this past century) works. BTW, the 1997 remastered version is THE ONE to pick up. All previous versions were nearly an entire half-step sharp! Here's an example from Kind of Blue, "So what":

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DEC8nqT6Rrk
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And lastly, I leave you with Steve Vai's "I know Your're Here"...just amazing. Here is a LIVE version from G3 2003 Denver. NO ONE plays like Vai. He is an entire genre unto himself. He's playing a triple necked guitar; a twelve string up top, a six sting in the middle, and a fretless on the bottom. The fretless is played through a Fernandez sustainer.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jY8wyKuLY2k

The Craftsman's progeny's Birthday.

He turned ONE last weekend and I attended his Birthday gathering. The Acupunturist and theDiscourser attended as well. Boy, did I feel completely out of place. Couples with little children running around all over the place. I would have felt a little less uncomfortable if I had my wife with me but unfortunately she didn't return from Oaxaca until that evening. I think the Acupunturist felt even more out of place...poor guy. In any case, the party was fantastic and we had a great time: the Craftsman's new front lawn/deck/planter box looked AWESOME, and best yet, there was alot of food.

I eat alot, as all of you know. That night, I swung by theProf's home for some L5R gaming: the Acupunturist, Rave-Boy, and NTT's Brain attended. TheProf's said something to me that I took to heart. It was regarding the RICE. You see, I eat alot of RICE...and when there isn't enough, I get angry. C'mon, rice is like five cents a cup and whenever we cook rice it always seems we never make enough! My goodness, if I'm there, just go ahead and make 20 cups and we'll be good for a couple of hours. In any case, the Prof told me "You have to learn how to share the rice.", and I suppose he's right. I can't claim the whole tub as my own, particulary if I'm at someone else's home. This almost childish lesson truly speaks to my near Neanderthal position with regards to this particular staple...and you can include SPAM into the mix, which is why it was pure Heaven when I arrived at the Warden's house to see a dozen cans stacked next to his fridge at our last CorpCon.

But I have to say, theProf's new downstairs ROCKS; a huge projector screen, surround sound, a PS-3, a fridge, freezer, and a RICE-COOKER...just perfect. L5R gaming was great. My high-power character, Tsuruchi Kasena, is struggling to maintain his sanity. I've gone back and forth re. what I'd like to do with him: take the honorable route vs. becoming an all out villain. I've decided (at least for now) to take the honorable route and try my best to follow the Code of Bushido. It's been difficult to get into the Rokugan mindset re. soul and sword. My guy is all about duty and acclaim, issues I can wrap my head around. Start talking about ancestor and honor, I'm a few steps behind. Rave-boy has been playing this game really well and I'm quite impressed with how he's been able to translate the Samurai psychology.

About my car and driving; thanks to thePerfectLine and his uploaded vids. I've watched it 10 times now and I'm jonesin to return to T-hill to continue my work. I'm actually at a point where MORE POWER is no longer my first (or even second) priority. I'd like the car to stop even more viciously and looking at some future options. Going for a full R-comp with tires are definitely in the future...as soon as I scrub through my stock Yokohama Advan A13 C's. I'm looking at my schedule over the next few months and plan to get a couple of track days in during that time.

I'm eating Popeye's chicken as I type and will need to head back outside where it feels like the surface of Mercury...I'm sweating through my shirt and I'll have to put up with it for a couple more hours...yuck.

Thunderhill Update:

So I can't say it better than thePerfectLine so here is a link to his blog. He even uploaded VIDEO! Amazing stuff. The last video is nearly 20 minutes long...the entire length of session five. Bear in mind, there is some swearing, but damn, it's a great learning tool for me.

http://theperfectlinecar.blogspot.com/

In any case, I drove a 2:16.100! I was shooting for a 2:18 and would have been happy with that time, which is one second slower than an BMW M-Roadster, 986 Boxter S, and S2000 (see www.fastestlaps.com). I was soo pleased with myself. But you have to understand; thePerfectLine got in my car and pussyfooted a very tentative 2:16 and 2:17 time with just 2 hot laps. I watched his video and there was absolutely NO DRAMA in the cabin; no sawing at the wheel, no blatant oversteer or understeer...very clean and smooth. My lap was far from that; high drama, squirrelly at several places, and jarring braking. I figure if thePerfectLine had a whole day (as in 5 sessions) in my car, he could pull a 2:10 easily by the end of the day.

Here are some shots of the car on track:

CORPCON and THUNDRHILL this weekend!

ThePerfectLine is flying up and renting a G37 and hitting the Track with me and Rave-Boy. TheDuff is making his long awaited appearance driving down from Portland (the most depressing city in America) to do some gaming and gettin some rides. TheWarden has put up his place as Goober Central and we'll have TheGM, the Prof, the Acupunturist, and NTT's Brain in attendance as well!

Re. track days: I've now been to nine track days and attended about a dozen others as a spectator receiving rides from instructors. One thing you notice about the cars that come to these events....you see the same model of cars every time. You'll see:

- Porsche's: 911's, Boxter's, and now more and more, the Cayman.
- BMW: mostly E36 and E46 M3's.
- Subaru: WRX's and STi's.
- Mitsubishi: EVO POWER!
- Mazda: Miata's mostly
- Honda: S2000's and Civic Type R's
- Lotus: Elise's and Exige's
- Corvette: mostly Z06's.
- Mini Cooper S's

And occasionally, you'll find a one or two:

- Audi: S4's mostly
- Mustang: GT's
- Nissan: 350's
- Ferrari's: 360's
- Acura NSX

Now for cars you will almost NEVER EVER SEE:

- Any other American heavy ass, rattle trap, brake-fading, overheating piece of shit.
- Mercedes Benz: Despite their prodigiously powerful AMG's, mostly blue-haired 60+ year old real estate brokers drive these 4000lb cruisers.
- Volvo's
- Saab's
- Lexus
- Infinity (maybe a G coupe every now and again)
- Any Korean Car
- Any SUV or Crossover or Hybrid
- And to reiterate: Buick, Cadillac, Chrysler, Dodge, GMC, Mercury, Oldmobile, Plymouth and Pontiac
- And any car weighing more than 4000lbs

To demonstrate, here is the list of cars that will be in attendance at our next Track Day:

http://speedventures.com/events/attendees.aspx?id=-1999999626

I will see my first DODGE at any track event I've ever been to at this event.

You see, 95% of automobiles can't even manage going around the track even for ONE LAP, particularly in stock configuration. Ask thePerfectLine. Give him the car for ONE HOT LAP balls out and I'm sure he could completely destroy most cars gearbox's, ignite a fire in the wheel well from the brake rotor heat, over-heat most cars piddly cooling system, send the oil temp through the roof, and boil the hell out of the brake fluid. I'm not saying that 95% of cars can't drive a lap at a road course because any car can drive a four minute lap at Thunderhill...my mother can drive a four minute lap at Thunderhill in her Toyota...okay, she can't, but her car can. What I'm saying is that 95% of cars when driven 10/10th's by a hot shoe will explode into pieces after just a few laps.

And thats what truly impresses me about most of these track-ready cars; their ability to endure massive amounts of abuse. They can rev and rev and rev and bounce off the limiter all day. You can pound and mash on the brakes till ABS kicks in 10 times every lap. You can throw it into a turn at a speed your mind can't accept, and the car just takes it again and again and asks for more.

I've never had that kind of car....until now.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY DISCOURSER!!

...and he will always be older than me. Hope you had a great conference and a fantastic Birthday bro.

Thunderhill Update:

It's Tuesday morning and I'm still sick in bed. I went into the NCRC track weekend feeling the onset of a cold so the lack of sleep, cold weather, and pushing my body eventually took its toll. Just a day to day/session by session/blow by blow:

Wednesday night last week: Helped Rave-Boy work on replacing his suspension, swap out rotors F/R, pads F/R, brake lines F/R, and brake fluid. Rave-boy's girlfriend, brother, and the Mighty Mook helped out. Rave-boy's brother ended up pretty much doing most of the work himself. We worked into the night and the temps started to drop and I felt the pangs of a cough coming on. That evening, I had about 5 hours of sleep....amped for Thunderhill.

Thursday night: Worked on my car, itemized everything I had to bring and laid it out in the garage. Had even less sleep that night...even more amped for the weekend.

Friday: Left work early, packed my car, took a shower, ate garbage for breakfast and lunch and made arrangements to meet with Rave-boy to caravan up. Hit massive traffic and got into Willows at around 9PM. Checked into two rooms at the Willows Motel 6.



Had a decent dinner while thePerfectline arrived at around 10:30 with a Lemon's Racer buddy. We had a couple of beers and chatted excitedly late into the evening. I started a hacking cough at around 4AM and couldn't get back to sleep.

Saturday early morning: Woke at 5 and we rushed over to Thunderhill in complete darkness. We anticipated rain so we wanted to arrive early to get a spot under an awning. Temp read 35 and I didn't bring a coat. We got a fantastic parking spot and I proceeded to replace my wheels in complete darkness save my headlamp. My hands felt frozen and my back was aching from all the heavy lifting.



7:15: Finished the wheels, feeling super amped about hitting the track, checked out some race cars and headed over to the main building for a drivers meeting.

1st session: Torqued my lugs to 85 foot lbs, checked fluids, set tire pressure to 32 psi cold, wanted to add some negative camber up front but thePerfectline gave me way too much shit. Lemons Racer teased me for not having enough negative camber and pointed out time and time again how all the other cars out there had more neg. camber than I did. Even wanted to dial in more aggressive compression/rebound but I decided against it especially with the Perfectline urging me to just "Go out and just DRIVE dammit!".

Buckled into the Schroth Ralleye Four ASM 4-point restraint, set the adjusting center differential to "Tarmac", set the ASC program and active Yaw control to the OFF position, warmed up the motor, slipped on some Sparco racing gloves, pulled on my helmet, and drove onto pre-grid with the other SOLO 2 drivers. I was soo giddy and nervous I had to concentrate on breathing deeply and evenly in the pit lane lest I quiver and pass-out from excitement.

The first session was spent on getting the jitters out. I drove only fast enough to keep up and spent that entire session paying attention to the car. You see, after having owned a Stage III S4, I've become paranoid about something breaking for YEARS. The first session was really eye-opening in-so-far that I realized how amazingly rock solid the EVO was. So I barely accelerated, barely hit the brakes, barely screeched the tires, and pretty much didn't work on any lines at all. Most everyone did the same...a feeling out session.

Half-way through the first session, Rave-boy spun his car on Turn 11. Here is the layout of the track:



I was behind a very fast 928 with 315 Hoosier racing slicks when I noticed Rave-boy's Supra spun out on the left. Here is video of his spin. You can see how he should have set up Track/Right, should have hit the brakes harder, turned in more aggressively and by the time he realized he missed the apex and heading for the barrels, his only recourse was to give the wheel more lock which resulted in a spin.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0VytExcwLw0

As you can see, nothing damaged but a bit of a bruised ego. It was Rave-boy's first session out in over a year and the cars in our run-group were CRAZY!!! I mean cammed Z06's with race-slicks, Lotus', EVO's, race-prepped M3's, GT-3's, and 911's for cryin out loud!

Session Two: Went out with thePerfectLine. I somehow think that an instructor in my passenger seat would make me less attentive to my driving, but it's never the case. If I could have thePerfectLine out for every session, that would have been awesome. Session two was spent on simply beginning to work on some lines. For the most part, I spent session two marveling at how savagely my car accelerates, how ludicrously my car brakes, and how utterly ridiculous the car handles. I was positively giddy after that session...and again, my car was completely rock solid throughout.

Between session 2 and 3, thePerfectLine took Rave-boy's car out into the much much faster point-by run group. Rave-boy returned after 10 laps with a big smile on his face. Both felt that his Supra, despite being old, handled very well and took aggressive track driving like a champ....except for one fatal flaw in it's engineering: The Brakes. The brakes did very well under extreme conditions; credit modern cryo slotted rotors, modern brake pad compounds, modern brake fluids. But the problem was the HEAT...it simply couldn't dissipate the heat. There was smoke coming from the front of the car and his entire wheel surface, not to mention his lug bolts, were soo hot we couldn't even touch them for half a second before it burnt our fingers. It was an easy fix really; more air circulation into the wheel well. His wheels, though nice to look at, provide no entrance for incoming air...and neither does his wheel well.

ThePerfectLine suggested we pull off the wheel to examine the brakes...bad idea but we didn't know it at the time. As Rave-boy started to unbolt, he realized the lug broke off. This part of the story really sucks and way to long to detail, but the bottom line was after 10 hours of wrenching on the car by a dozen different people in several different shops, we couldn't fix the problem. Poor Rave-boy got only ONE session in before his car broke...and this is the stupid part: the part that broke was a two dollar part which no one can access or replace without special tools!....ARGH! I felt horribly for Rave-boy.

Next, thePerfectLine took me out in my car. This was a bad idea from the beginning; he's never driven my car ever and he'll be learning to drive the car on a race-track in one of the fastest run-groups. After two laps of practice, he came in to pick me up in the pit lane. His grin was from ear to ear and he could not stop praising the EVO's track prowess. I got in two laps before my stomach urged me to pull off, and let me tell you, those two laps were unbelievable! My car is soo stupid crazy fast in every frickin level that thePerfectLine could have conceivable passed even the fastest cars on the race-track! I was in awe not only of the car, but of his driving.

Here are some shots of the first day via Gotbluemilk.com. Apparently, there were two car #777. In one shot, you can see me passing Rave-boy's Supra. His car was #555 BTW.

http://gotbluemilk.com/web090321/777/index.html

He dropped me off at the pit lane and took off for a couple of more laps. I walked back to our parking spots to help Rave-boy work on his wheel lugs when thePerfectLine drove in and exclaimed, "You're not going to believe this buddy...I spun your car...". I immediately rushed to inspect for damage, and let me tell you, my first inclination was to kick thePerfectline in the face for spinning my car. But after noticing no damage save a rubber plastic lip guard and a small dent on the stock Enkei rims, my panic and anger abated and I resolved to simply state that thePerfectLine will never drive my car on a race-track ever again.

You see, his problem is not his skill...he is mondo-skilled and the best driver I've driven with, save an instructor with BMW GGC. ThePerfectline's problem is that he's reckless. He has spun half a dozen times on race-tracks and you'd think he'd learn his lesson after the fifth spin, but clearly he did not.

Anywayz, by lunch, I was pooped. We ate, watched a race, and headed back to our cars.

Session 3,4, and 5 were a blur. I realize that I have soo much fun driving that I forget how to drive the line properly. This is why I need instruction. By the end of the day, I'm hitting T1 to T5 pretty well and the the two scariest turns (T1 and T8) were now my favorite turns on the track. The other turns were pure crap. Every lap meant a different line but I began to actually use my brakes in a way I never had before...my Brembo's are AMAZING!!

Saturday Evening: Said goodbye to Lemon's Racer and headed back to town. We left the POS Miata at the track and had some Chinese food for dinner. Poor Rave-boy was still working on his car late into the evening. I was truly upset for the guy. I hung out with him a bit and he seemed defeated, understandably. We anticipated rain the next day and though he was signed up for the whole weekend, he just wanted to go home at that point...and I don't blame him. I would have felt the same.

BTW, I hadn't gone to the bathroom to "expel" for nearly 48 hours now, was coughing like mad, developing chest congestion, and shivering now and again. I got to bed by 11 and thePerfectLine was out like a light with his glasses on his face and the TV on the Speed Channel.

Sunday: I checked outside for rain....NONE! The forecast called for 2 days of rain. We've had not ONE DROP so far. Despite that, I expected rain today...I mean, how lucky can we get? Apparently, very lucky. It didn't rain a drop on Sunday either. It was surreal to see rain clouds and storms to the North, South, East and West of us but nothing at all at Thunderhill...spooky.

We rushed to get out to our first session. I was going a bit faster now, actually utilizing my brakes and accelerating harder between turns. Rave-boy decided to stay, and I was soo glad to hear that. He had his other car here and we stripped it clean of any debris, tech inspected it, and asked the coordinator's if Rave-boy could drop down to the Novice group. They allowed it and he went out for two sessions that day...and according to thePerfectLine, he did ten times better than the day before.

You see, the worst thing you can do is place yourself in the wrong run group. Having better more experienced and skilled drivers around you makes for high anxiety with cars zooming past you everywhere. You can't learn to drive when you're concentrating on people passing you every 1.2 seconds. I know from first hand experience. While as an absolute beginner at a NASA event, I accidentally went out with the Race-group...my GOD, "GET ME OUT OF HERE!", is the only thing on your mind.

By the time session 2 and 3 rolled around, the Mighty Mook and his better half arrived to get some rides. I took Mook out first and he had a great time. I drove slow and tried to work on some lines but having Mook in the car was too distracting.

Here are some shots of Mook in the car with me on Sunday:

http://gotbluemilk.com/web090322/777/index.html

During session three, Mook's girlfriend went out with me and she had a great time. Again, I drove slowly not knowing how much her stomach can take but apparently I've discovered I have the weakest stomach I know.

As for session 4, it was a complete revelation for me. Went out with thePerfectLine and it finally occurred to me that I need to brake more aggressively and actually HIT the apex burms. It was an epiphany during the last 2 laps...HIT THE APEX BURMS in T9, T10, T11, and T5 and your exit speed and your exit position is increased and improved substantially.

But by the end of session 4, my body and mind were devastated. I said goodbye to Rave-boy and his girlfriend who decided to bail early. I'm just glad he decided to stay. He learned alot, as I'm told, and his next experience will be soo much better, I'm sure. At our next track day, we decided and planned on lining up on pre-grid last and do some lead/follows together with zero traffic. We can both learn alot that way.

I replaced my wheels and said goodbye to thePerfectline. I skipped the last session to get a ride with the most powerful car in my run-group; a cammed Z06 with race-rubber putting down close to 600 to the wheels (which is close to 750 HP to the crank). What a way to end the weekend; a ride in the fastest car I've ever ridden in. The acceleration was soo savage that if you didn't have your helmet pressed against the headrest, you'd be sure to get whiplash during upshifts. And the grip from the 335 Hoosiers bordered on insanity. Despite the car's amazing speed and grip, he took turns no more cleanly nor more quickly than I do....it's just that his exit acceleration is soo much more monstrous and he's not afraid to punch it in the straights and fearless about his brakes in the braking zone.

All of this has left me feeling that I have alot of unfinished business at Thunderhill. I can't wait to go back with what I've learned and string together some really fast laps. I think I have it in me, and I KNOW the EVO is capable of anything I can throw at her.

Next time, I hope more of you guys can make it. I'm happy to give rides, just as long as you don't puke.

Cars again?

Please don't think that there is nothing else going on in my life but cars. It's just that my blog makes it appear that way. Most of the time I don't like to talk about my work, primarily because I work hard to leave work at "work". I have some pretty strong boundaries and so do most of my colleagues. As far as I know, not ONE of the some thirty of us that make up our particular office have anything other than work relationships; no outside get-togethers, no hangin out on the weekend, no going out to a game, no dinner and drinks after work on Friday, ZIP, NADA, ZERO....and I believe we all prefer it this way. I think this is what happens when you work with a bunch of psychologists, clinical social workers, therapists, and psychiatrists...perhaps we do it to compartmentalize the work so it becomes more tolerable, less aggravating, and less powerful a force in our lives. I'd like to think of it as balance or homeostasis.

But please, make no mistake though, I love reading my fellow blogger's work-site tales. Perhaps because they seem soo much more interesting and entertaining than mine. To come to think of it, if I actually talked about the individual client's I work with, it would probably depress you or anger you. So I think I'll avoid talking about them.

Anywayz, back to cars. The EVO is almost ready for her first track weekend at Thunderhill. Rave-boy, his partner, and thePerfectLine will be at attendance as well. I can't even tell you how excited I am about taking her on the track for the first time. I'm most certainly taking it slow for the first couple sessions and slowly adding more aggression over the weekend.

So here are some new shot of the car all tricked out....I LOVE IT!